Listening to the Quiet

Well all the hustle bustle of the holiday leaves me feeling a bit speechless today and has given me some quiet time to reflect. I am thinking about my book-- "Twisted Journey to Grace" that I started writing earlier this year and lost my drive and momentum to finish it. There are several chapters when I think about them still bring sadness, disappointment and deep pain to my thoughts. A new found friend has assured me this is a healthy thing. I didn't realize it until he pointed out... at least I am "feeling" again. I have no idea how long I have been in the state of "not feeling" but if I leap through the chapters, I can see a point where I lost faith in myself and others. The good news is it deepened my faith in Him. During that time, I lost connection with many people who truly cared about me but just didn't know how to help me. It has taken me several years to understand that just because we are waiting and listening for guidance from Him doesn't mean we should do it alone. It is not in His plan for us to work solo with God but in sync with Him and other caring Christians. Over this past year, I have tried to reconnect with the relationships that were damaged during my time of waiting. Many people have stepped up to the table to reconnect and many people to my disappointment are gone for good. My faith is strong, I am hearing and feeling once again and I "feel" strong purpose. It's amazing how listening to the quiet feels differently now.